I have the following follow requests and I don't know who these people are. Is it you?

Carrie Sheinbein @Donampii
Laura (dusty_rose) @TutusNTinyHats
Marianna @GreenMamasPad
James Weston @GorlestonJames
Monika Eggers @GreenSkyOverMe
Stephie @MonocledCat
eve phillips @mrsflipss
Nikki Traynor @dancinginmypjs
Emma @pseudodeviant
Verity Allan @verityallan
Jules LoVecchio @Diran_Sky
toothfairy_1977 @toothfairy_1977
Fat Bird Tweets @Fat_Bird_Tweets
Lisa Chalkley @living_as_if
Poi_Girl @poi_girl
Word Geek @word_geek
Gill Shackleton @galena_g
ZucchiniBikini @ZucchiniBikini
Sara Sara @Teh_Woo
Fiona ON @famron
Emily Morrell @emslondon
John O'Dwyer @TheSliverParty
Irina @irinarempt
Richard Cooke @rmcooke42
Vicky @vickyosullivan
me and me @arandomstranger
Dawn R @Boneist
Jacqui Crane @__jacqui__
aphie @aphie
LouLouK @LouLouK
F is for Faye @fisforfaye
AlisonW @AlisonW

The same doctor who had the chance to require a pregnancy test earlier but didn't make clear it was non-optional until it was too late? He also talked over me when saying "reason for procedure" - He said "reason for procedure, contraception," and I said "No, to control my periods," and he said "Oh no, it's for contraception." WTF? Contraception is for people who are well enough to have sex lives, sunshine. Take your pregnancy test and shove it.

So yesterday morning I took my pills, had a shower, got dressed, got into a taxi, went to the hospital, found my way to the very poorly signposted Adult Day Surgery Unit mainly because people going to work noticed I looked lost and helped me, and took off almost all my clothes and got into a hospital gown. A lot of the hospital gowns are missing tapes at the back, it turns out. Luckily I had a dressing gown.

The whole thing was fine, except that THREE people asked me "Is there a chance you might be pregnant?" - No - "Do you want a pregnancy test?" - No. Then when it was time for my op the porter checked I'd been to the loo, and wheeled me down. And THEN, one of the people who had spoken to me BEFORE I went to the loo, the actual SURGEON, said they wouldn't do the op unless I had a pregnancy test.

So they wheeled me from the pre-theatre anaesthetic room into recovery, which was just BRILLIANT for my PTSD, and of course there are absolutely no toilets in recovery, so they got a bedpan, but weirdly people who've been nil by mouth for six hours and made sure to pee before going to theatre don't have full bladders. It turns out.

It didn't matter what I said about my own body, cycle, sexual life, etc... He wouldn't take my word for it AND HE COULD HAVE CHECKED EARLIER.

Eventually the senior consultant came in and talked to me and HE seemed to believe me but he said they'd have to do a test anyway, for Legal Reasons (which sounds like Because Reasons to me) and so I had to have a

FUCKING CATHETER.

The most pain I was in all yesterday was from the catheter. I hate catheters. They are incredibly bad for my continence and I hate hate hate them.

Now I'm feeling just as ill as I was on Tuesday before the hospital, but I can't tell if it's because of the period I was having anyway or because of the op.

It's all about periods. They have been getting worse and worse and coming closer and closer together. Last month (about three weeks ago really) and this I had to get Rob to come home from work because I couldn't stand or sit or hold a phone or anything. And tomorrow I go into hospital to get a hormonal coil under general anaesthetic.

I hope it works. Migraines daily for two weeks a month and bleeding heavily for one and then a day or two off and start again isn't a sustainable pattern. I know I coped before I had babies but actually no I didn't, it's just it's easier to half-do everything for a computer job than for children, especially when my half-do is quite, ahahahaha, intense.

Between me keeling over totally (for a while I was able to sit up in bed) and another adult arriving in the house, the children set up softplay in the sitting room! They brought in the Little Tykes slide, got Linnea's trampoline down from her room, and filled the sitting room with cushions and quilts. They are completely wonderful children and also geniuses of the highest order.

I have a faint recollection of suggesting bringing in the slide but I was ill so it's not my fault.

Hi,

While at my pre-op today for a gynaecological issue I saw a notice up asking that staff remind women to shave before surgery. I asked the nurse if I should shave, and she said no, but that the consultant preferred "ladies" to "tidy the garden."

The consultant's aesthetic preferences are not a patient's concern, and should never be made a patient's concern, and if there is no surgical need - no incision within the hairline, etc - then there is no medical requirement to depilate. Genital exposure is personal enough without bringing the surgeon's personal aesthetic preferences into it.

I have a personal preference for a gynaecologist who can cope with normal adult female anatomy.

A.

I installed an app on my phone which tracks my movement. I lay the phone on the mattress between me and the wall, and it records my level of movement and noise, and turns that into an idea of how deeply I am asleep. It uses this to wake me during periods of increased movement and lighter sleep, so the alarm isn't as disturbing and I wake feeling more awake.

It seems to work.

Quick post only, but if you ask interesting questions I might answer them later. I've not been very posty lately.

New Year - we stayed up, all FIVE of us, with Jools on the telly. It was fine, but I'm knackered. This is partially because Astrid has another cold and is sleeping even less than usual and also coughed herself sick in my bed last night.

Plumbing crisis - on, like, Saturday, we discovered that the waste pipe form our toilet pan to the drain hole was gone. It had dissolved. A man came at ENORMOUS cost to replace it, and was lovely and pleasant and careful and reasonably efficient, but a rat jumped out at him when he put his miner's lamp near the hole in the floor leading to the sewers. He beat it to death with an adjustable spanner. Also we need to replace our floor, under which all the waste water (but not the solids, thankfully) has been flooding.

Christmas - we had a great time, with Rob's parents, and a cardboard tree, and TONS of food.

Travel to Ireland - we saw more family than usual, and stayed with the usual friends, and will never again go away in the run up to Christmas, because making Christmas happen was incredibly hard work given the time constraints.

Travel to Wales - I had my birthday cake there! we stayed in Seren Lloft and saw Jupiter, it was GREAT. Go there, but ask me first because I want to go again and I'd hate the dates to clash.

I'm really tired, but installed a sleep tracking app and apparently I get 6h sleep on average, of which an average of about 65% is deep sleep, and so that's probably why I'm tired. And why I haven't painted as much lately.

That's about it I think.

Oh, it's all hospital all the time this month - checkups, pre-ops, and my gynae minor op. That's it.

PRESENTS almost all wrapped
STOCKINGS almost all assembled
FOOD all bought and almost all sorted ready to prep
TV GUIDE triaged and highlights listed on two sides of A4
KITCHEN pretty much tidied, thanks to Rob
NEW DRESS bought but not tried on, hope it fits, should fit, eek, impulse clothes purchase!
FESTIVE CHEER in a bun dance

It's almost time! The children are irritable and wound up, the house is full of food we don't have space to store, the tree (Cardboard recycled reusable tree FTW!) is up and lit, the spare lights because we couldn't find fewer than 12 metres of coloured LEDS are up near the ceiling, the presents are almost all bought, a LOT of presents are wrapped, and we didn't decide to have Santa give the kids anything large which required assembly.

GO US.

It's just hard to remember sometimes when other people don't. I love that the library, playgrounds, swimming pool, supermarket, small local shops, train stations and bus routes are all close enough and easy enough that a nine-year-old could go out and about on her own and do stuff. I love that I can walk everywhere, not least because it means the children can walk everywhere, which gives them much more independence later on. I love that there are tons of parks and playgrounds within 5 minutes' walk and more, larger ones within 15 minutes' walk and a HUGE one less than 30 minutes' walk (but I never go there because I don't like it. Still, the children could if they wanted to). I love my house, because it's small enough that I never feel like I don't know who might be in it or where they might be. I love the garden because even if we don't look after it it's small enough to get habitable quite quickly. I love the fences because they're low enough to chat to the neighbours. I love knowing my neighbours. I love that the children have friends they can visit without an adult to help (well, not the 2-year-old). I love the farmers' market and the town-centre stuff at Christmas and summer holidays.

I just feel ashamed of it all because it's not what other people think I ought to have and do. Which is nonsense.